A Space Cowboy for the 60 Billion Man
by The Anime Crew
Summary: Ever wonder what who would wiin between Vash and Spike? Spike and the rest of the Bebop crew go after Vash the Stampede but will they catch him?
1. A new Bounty

Vash'sChick: Ever wonder who would win if Vash met Spike? Hm . *ponders* Trigun meets Cowboy Bebop. I did too! Well you'll have to find out and get back to me cuz I dunno either! Oh did I lead you to think you were gonna find out here? Woops ^_^ R/R! Tankies!! Oh yeah I guess I should do a disclaimer huh?  
  
Disclaimer: This is the disclaimer. I don't own the people you recognize. I wish I did, but sadly I don't and if I did, I wouldn't be posting this here, it would be on t.v! Durr.  
  
Vash'sChick: Ok I lied, you will find out what happens when Vash meets Spike and Faye and Jet and Ed. But what about Meryl, Milly, and Wolfwood and all the separate show's own bad guys? Well.you'll see. Maybe. Unless I decided to lie again.Oh yeah and if you do decide to review please gimme some reasons who you think would win and why. ^_^ Just so I have something to go off of.  
  
Spike lay on the couch in front of the small TV they had. The same show that's always on was on again. There was a bounty on some thief's head for not too much money. Spike growled and kicked the TV.  
  
"Hey man, clam down." Jet said, not really paying attention while he was cutting his beloved bonsai trees.  
  
"We don't have any money!! And no one out there is worth anything!"  
  
Faye walked in with a towel wrapped around her head. She pulled it down and started to brush wet hair.  
  
"What's wrong now Mr. Grumpy?" she asked, not really caring.  
  
"We have no money." He growled at her, scowling.  
  
"Oh jeez, sorry I asked."  
  
"Edward knows where we can get money!" Ed said bouncing on the floor next to her computer.  
  
Spike sat over by her.  
  
"You do!? Where!? How?!"  
  
"Well the computer told Edward that they have just discovered a new planet here! It's called Gunsmoke and there's an outlaw that has 60,000,000,000 double dollars on his head!"  
  
Ed squeaked and ran over to Ein, picked her up and swung her around, giggling.  
  
"Hey Jet, you know anything about Gunsmoke? And what the hell are double dollars?" Spike asked, jamming his hands in his pockets and walking over to Jet and his Bonsai trees with renewed hope, that just as soon as it came, deflated as he got his answer.  
  
"Nope, ask Ed."  
  
Spike mumbled something about him not caring about money as long as he has scissors and a midget tree and went over to Ed. He took the dog and put her down.  
  
"Ed, what do you know about the planet.or the man?"  
  
"Edward knows a lot!"  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Edward knows that the planet is covered in sand and desert. There are two suns and 5 moons. The man's name is Vash the Stampede and he wears a red coat and has blonde hair, he has a big silver gun and has destroyed two cities there. Augusta and July. Oh yeah, and he loooooves donuts, like Edward!!" Ed bounded away down the hall.  
  
"Should we get started then?" he asked turning to Jet and Faye. ~*~*~*~  
  
Vash sat at the bar, drinking a beer and trying to think.  
  
'What do I do now that Legato, my brother, and everything I was aiming to do is over and dead!?' he screamed mentally and sipped his beer. He rubbed his eyes furiously.  
  
"This is going to be boring!" he yelled and slammed his drink down, walking out of the saloon. He shoved his hands in his pockets and stomped down the street.  
  
"Well, I guess I could always occupy myself with bounty hunters." he mumbled, kicking up sand into his face.  
  
"Keh!!" he said and rubbed his face madly, trying to get the sand out of his nose and eyes, as well as his mouth. Someone tapped him on the shoulder and he spun around.  
  
"Where have you been!?!" screamed an angry Meryl as she started to beat him in the middle of the town. "Why haven't you told us where you were?! We are still supposed to watch you!! I don't care what's over!! We HAVE to watch you!!" Vash huddled in a ball on the ground trying to answer the furious woman's questions through the fat lip she gave him. He managed to get up when she was out of breath from yelling so much.  
  
"I was at the saloon!! Because you would have stopped me!! AND I KNOW YOU HAVE TO WATCH ME!!!" he screamed back at her and stalked away.  
  
"Insurance girls still following me around like lost puppies. Bored. Nothing to do but get beat up and now I have a fat lip to go along with all this boredom!! CAN NOTHING GO RIGHT?!" he plopped down onto a nearby bench, crosses his arms and scowled. The kids playing in front of him took one look at him and ran.  
  
"Great now the kids think I'm scary! Grr!" He sighed and uncrossed his arms and looked up at the sky. A smile spread across his face.  
  
"What am I angry for?! It's over! It's finally over.boring.yet over!" he got up and started dancing to the amusement of the town, who were all now watching him, laughing. He stopped, noticing them, rubbed the back of his head, blushing, and ran away to the hotel room he shared with the insurance girls. He opened the door and found the place a wreck.  
  
"What happened here?"  
  
There were bullet holes in the walls and everything was smashed. A bed was turned over and there was a note on the door.  
  
"I'm leaving you, you piece of scum and I never wanna see you again!" It was signed Julie.  
  
"Whoops, wrong room!"  
  
He walked out of the room, re-taping the note to the upturned bed before he left and walked into the room next door. Three odd looking people were searching the room and didn't even realize he walked in. One was tall in a blue suit with puffed curly looking blue/black hair. The other looked more strong and bald with a fake arm, and a metal strip under his eye. The last was a girl with short black/purple hair, in a skimpy yellow number with a red jacket tossed over it. They all held guns. Vash stared, in shock and slowly back out of the door. The bald one saw the movement out of the corner of his eye. He swung around and pointed the gun at Vash.  
  
"Who are you!?" Vash yelled, putting his hands up in surrender.  
  
"I'm Jet, this is Spike, and Faye. And you must be Vash the Stampede."  
  
"Who's Vash the Stampede?" Vash asked trying to sound like he didn't know who he was.  
  
"You mean, you're not him?" Spike said outraged.  
  
"Nope. Never seen the guy." Vash lowered his arms.  
  
"He's lying," Faye said, cocking her gun.  
  
"No, I don't know him!!" he started crying. "Please don't kill me!!" he whined.  
  
"This moron can't be him. Jet, you led us to the wrong place," Spike said growling at him again.  
  
"Feh, maybe the tracker's broken."  
  
"You guys are so incompetent," Faye mumbled and pushed past the crying form on the floor.  
  
Vash clung to her leg.  
  
"Hey what are you doing?!" she yelled trying to shake him off.  
  
Vash sobered and stood up straight.  
  
"Young lady, do you need a body guard? I'd be happy to provide my services for a beauty such as you for free!"  
  
He grinned an extremely cheesy grin and Faye sighed. She knocked him over the head with the butt of her gun and walked back down out the back door to the ship that was landed in the sand. Two minutes later Jet and Spike walked out and got into the ship with her.  
  
"Good job Jet," Faye scolded him and sat back in her seat. "You led us to a perverted cry baby.  
  
"I'm telling you the tracker said he was here!" he yelled fiddling with the machine, gave up and threw it against the wall.  
  
"Great, now it's fixed." She quipped and crossed her arms over her chest.  
  
"I get the feeling that was him," Spike said out of nowhere. "We should try to get a room in the hotel and follow him around for a while. Something will lead us to the truth."  
  
"Did Spike just get a GOOD idea?" Faye asked Jet stupefied.  
  
"I think so."  
  
Vash'sChick: Ok that's the first chappie! Please review! 


	2. Vash the Stampede

Miroku's Chick: Yeah, sorry I changed my name so many times, but I like to belong to living people.and people who aren't my brother ^_^ so anyway.on with the fic! I know I took a while to update but I had to read TO LOVE A HUMAN (- shameless plug) in front of my whole drama class. Surprisingly they thought it was good! But I was still shaking. Yeah scary I know. But enough rambling. Readies and reviewies!! _*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*  
  
Spike, Jet, Faye walked calmly into the hotel with Ed bouncing along behind them. Faye stepped up to the guy at the desk and smiled at him.  
  
"We need a room for a while," she said in a flirtatious voice.  
  
The guy stuttered. He was only about 17.  
  
"I... uh.sure. Right this way."  
  
The boy led them to a room that happened to be a floor above Vash's room. They were directly above it. When the boy left Spike sighed and lit a cigarette.  
  
"We should be able to watch him well from here," he said in a bored sarcastic voice.  
  
"Ed knows how we can watch Mr. Stampede!!" she sang bouncing around on the bed.  
  
"How Ed?" Jet asked looking through the kitchen to see what he was going to have to work with. "Hm. this kitchen is better than the Bebop's!"  
  
Spike and Faye rolled their eyes, but Ed ignored the comment and answered Jet's question in a simple voice that said 'duh, why didn't you think of this?'  
  
"Spike-person could hang off the balcony and lookie into Vash- person's roomie!!"  
  
The cigarette fell out of Spike's mouth.  
  
"I don't think so," he said stepping on it before it lit anything on fire.  
  
"It's the only plan we've got, Faye get some rope from the ship."  
  
Faye practically skipped out of the room grinning. Spike was going to hang outside the legendary outlaw's room. HA!  
  
"I can't believe I'm doing this," he mumbled rubbing his face and Faye shut the door behind her.  
  
She walked with a bounce in her step down the hall and to the elevator. She pressed the button and the door automatically opened, revealing a short woman with short black hair and wore an outfit of white. Faye looked her up and down. The woman snorted.  
  
"Nice outfit," Faye commented.  
  
"I would say the same to you, except there's not much of an outfit to compliment."  
  
The doors opened yet again and the woman got out. Faye shrugged and pulled her shorts up. The doors opened one last time and Faye stepped out and started walking to the back of the hotel and out the backdoor. She found the tall blonde in a red jacket staring at the ship with a bag full of doughnuts in his arms, munching on them. He started to poke it.  
  
"What are you doing to Bebop?!" she screamed and ran over to him, smacking his hand away form the ship.  
  
"It's.it's.so modern."  
  
Faye blinked at him and walked inside the ship. She walked down a few halls and into the living room area. She opened a drawer near the computer and took out some chains and some rope.  
  
"Watchya doing with that stuff?"  
  
Faye whipped around and saw the blonde still stuffing his face with doughnuts standing behind her, watching her.  
  
"Why are you here!? Get out!"  
  
His lip started to tremble and she sighed.  
  
"How do you eat like that and stay that skinny?" she asked him, walking past him and back through the halls and out the door. She bustled back into the hotel before he answered.  
  
"I like doughnuts!"  
  
"I see that."  
  
She stepped into the elevator, leaving him behind. She walked back into the room with the rope and chains in hand.  
  
"Here ya go, Spike!" she said oh to cheerily.  
  
"Thanks, Faye Faye!" he replied in a mockingly similar voice.  
  
"Now Spike, you have to hang down off the balcony to observe him, but don't get yourself seen!! Got that?" Jet said waving the spoon he was using to cook with at him.  
  
"Yeah yeah, of course."  
  
He tied the rope around him and twisted it through the chain and tied the chains to the rail of the balcony. Faye stood on the balcony with him as security.  
  
"I'm glad you're my security, Faye," he sneered and lowered himself down toward Vash's room. He mumbled something about falling for sure and poked his head toward the window to Vash's room. _*_*_*_  
  
Meryl danced around the room alone, singing some random song into a hairbrush, not knowing that she was being watched. Spike dangled outside of the window watching her sing. He chuckled to himself as Vash burst in the door. Of course he wasn't completely sure it was Vash yet..yet. Meryl stopped in her tracks, horrified. Spike was full out laughing now, although they couldn't hear him.  
  
"VASH, HOW DARE YOU BURST IN ON ME LIKE THAT!!!" the girl Spike had now dubbed "swingin singer" screamed at him.  
  
Spike stopped laughing and stood, well, hung open mouthed. Faye heard this and hung her head over the balcony and tugged at the rope to signal him back up, but it loosened the knot and the chains slipped off the rail, dropping Spike to the floor with a deafening thud. He sat up, rubbing his head.  
  
"FAYE!!" he screamed up to the next level, but was returned with a horrified look as Meryl whacked him in the head with the brush she'd been singing into. Spike jumped up, still rubbing his head.  
  
"What'd you do that for!?" he whined.  
  
"HOW DARE YOU SPY ON ME!!" Meryl screamed at him.  
  
"I wasn't spying on you, I was looking for Mr. I dunno Vash the Stampede over here!!" he yelled pointing in the direction of a dumbfounded Vash staring at Spike still.  
  
"What.why are you after me?!" he squealed.  
  
"Money!!" Spike yelled and bolted toward him. Vash screamed and fled from the room, slamming the door behind him. Spike skidded to a halt before he hit the door just as it swung open again and a tall blonde girl walked in. Spike was knocked out behind the door.  
  
"Meryl, I just saw Mr. Vash running out of the hotel, screaming.do you.oh who's this?" she asked looking down at the unconscious Spike.  
  
"He wants the bounty of Vash's head."  
  
"Oh.what are we gonna do with him?"  
  
At that precise moment Faye and Jet burst in the door, guns pointed at the girls. _*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*  
  
Miroku's Chick: yay! Chappie 2 done! Please review I'd love you forever and ever!! Anyway, my drama teacher said me a good writer. ^_^ I was so happy that someone that's a teacher sed that. ::sigh:: I feel inspired! Maybe I'll update all my stories!! Yay!! 


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